Close up of Woman Holding Hands with spouse and trying to reconnect

How to Reconnect with Your Spouse

2022-12-05T23:30:46+00:00

By Rody

We know how hectic day-to-day activities can get, especially for women. We tend to go on auto-pilot mode for a long time thereby neglecting certain facets of our lives including our spouses.It’s quite normal for life to take its toll on us, which causes gaps in our connections, leaving issues unresolved and things unsaid. All of these can build up and eventually affect our relationships.Also, thinking that our spouse will always be accessible, and available can negatively impact our relationship.These and many other reasons cause the loss of connection with our spouse.How then do we make a conscious effort to reconnect with our spouse?

Understand the situation

What is the root of the problem? In what ways has the connection been lost?This can be understood by taking time out to analyze where the loss in connection stemmed from. For example, is it that you don’t sit together for dinner anymore due to work schedules?Or your weekend timeout has been tampered with because of an extra shift at work? Knowing the cause of the problem is the first step to solving it.

Put them in your plans

Having understood the complexity of the situation, the next thing to do is to intentionally create time for your spouse. Plan how to better the situation through simple acts included in your routine to feed the relationship.For example, make sure you always get to eat dinner together, drop your phones/gadgets by 9 pm, have actual conversations, and spend time together before bed. Taking small steps amounts to reinforcing the feeling of love that exists between both of you.

Bring back effective communication

Having clear communication is such an underrated aspect of relationships. When all grievances and happiness are expressed clearly and effectively, it helps one’s spouse to know what’s going on and to avoid assumptions that can potentially ruin relationships. Effective communication solves a lot of problems and nips looming ones in the bud.

Put down your phone

The use of technology sometimes does a lot of harm to our relationships. We must not allow our interactions with other people to affect our most important connection. When on that dinner date with your spouse, put your phone on DND (Do not disturb). This will help your partner know that you prioritize them and do not take them for granted.Also, comparing your spouse with random people who you do not know their realities and placing expectations on your spouse based on their social media interactions can cause problems for your relationship. Focus on your relationship, and treat its situation with its complexities and dynamics.

Relearning their love language

Overfamiliarity tends to let us think that our spouse is okay with everything that we do. Relearning their love language involves bringing back the things that you used to do for them to make them light up.

And it could also be done by asking them again. Your spouse knows you have them in mind and are conscious about their needs.

Surprise them

Doing things unexpectedly is always a plus, this will make your spouse feel special, and know that you’re constantly thinking of them. It helps them to feel that deep care for them exists in the relationship.

Acts like showing up at their office with their favourite meal, booking a movie ticket for them, scheduling a spa session for them on tired days, and also making time out from your sacred times for them once in a while will further strengthen your relationship.When all due diligence has been done, it is crucial to note that reconnecting has to be something both parties want and is not one-sided because it is important to have healthy relationships where both partners are in love with each other.So knowing when to stop trying or continue is important and requires a discerning mind.

Conclusion

Losing a connection with your spouse is normal. However, it can also cause friction and eventually disrupt the relationship. Making conscious efforts to bring back the spark is important for the growth of the relationship. This should, however, be done with a partner that is fully onboard with reconnecting.